Last week, we talked about the best five missions in the GTA franchise. Of course, there’s no shortage of great missions, but there are also plenty of missions that make you want to tear your hair out. These are the ones that get us going crazy.
5. Boomshine Blowout - Vice City Stories
That Phil Cassidy is always getting himself in some kind of trouble! After Vic Vance finds him stumbling around sloppy drunk, he tells Vic that the Cholo gang is planning to blow up his precious Boomshine, a volatile liquor of his own concoction. When they get to his warehouse, they see that the fire has already been set, and they need to get his four crates out of there before they explode. The problem with this mission is that Vic has to get on a forklift and navigate his way around the stuff in the warehouse in a short amount of time. The camera angle is fixed so that you, the player, can see where he needs to go. After each crate is loaded, a little debris from the fire drops down, blocking a path, making it a more complex drive to get back to the Boomshine. So you have a short time limit, a fixed camera angle, a long forklift, and narrow areas to drive through. Every time I’ve managed to beat this mission, I’ve always been a split second away from failing, and it’s incredibly frustrating to get there.
4. Wrong Side Of The Tracks – San Andreas
This mission in GTA: San Andreas was one that relied on patience, and persistent driving. You and your homie Big Smoke go to a “meeting” between the Vagos of Los Santos and the Rifa of San Fierro. The plan is to crash said meeting and reap the rewards, unfortunately, things don’t go as planned. After an ambush, the Vagos try and escape on a train so it’s up to you to drive a motorbike while Big Smoke attempts to take out the Vagos on the train. Sure, it may sound simple on paper but the circumstances surrounding it are anything but.
You have to keep up with the train while avoiding cops, gangbangers, and other trains. Even though it is in the middle of the game, it is still extremely easy to mess up and go off track or even off road into the water. However, if you avoid those obstacles there’s still the matter of the Vagos on the train. All it takes is proper biking and steady driving to keep Big Smoke in an accurate shooting trajectory. Despite only getting respect as a reward the completion of this mission leads you to the most unexpected group…the Russian mob.
3. Jive Drive – Vice City Stories
When Vic picks up his brother, Lance Vance, from the Vice City airport, he runs into more of those pesky Cholos, who are mad about him roughing up their men. With Lance behind the wheel, they begin a car chase, with Vic leaning out the window to shoot at the gang. It’s a fun ride, with Run DMC’s, “It’s Like That,” playing over the soundtrack. Unfortunately, that’s not the frustrating part. Near the end of the mission, the car eventually crashes, and you have to get out and defend yourself on foot in a small, confined area. Cholo vehicles drive up and you have to kill many them while protecting Lance, who is run by terrible AI and has a pitifully short health bar. Even if you do manage to kill all of the Cholos without him dying, you get a two-star wanted level. Remember, I said you were in a small area, and most of the exits are blocked with Cholo vehicles now. That’s all right, though, we’ll just escape in one of-oh, they’re locked, I can’t drive any of these. Here’s where you realize the VCPD’s response time is surprisingly faster than you’d expect as you scramble to find a vehicle you and Lance can escape in. If Lance dies, you have to start all the way back at the beginning, and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard “It’s Like That” just because of this mission.
2. Farewell, My Love – San Andreas
This mission saw the end of anything between CJ and Catalina. After a rocky connection between the two, Catalina left CJ and got herself a “real man.” Catalina’s new man? None other than Claude, the protagonist of Grand Theft Auto III which sets up that game pretty well. Ever since that mission, I stopped San Andreas as there was no way for me to possibly win the race. The race being given to you by Catalina’s cousin and Kendl’s boyfriend Cesar Vialpando is the one mission in the entire GTA series I cannot beat. I’ve tried every cheat, tactic, and screw over I could possibly imagine. I know, I know, it’s just a race but this is in my opinion, the worst/hardest one ever.
Talking about races is one thing but doing them is a completely different demon. I’m not ashamed to admit this but I am bad at racing games so this was a gigantic powder keg ready to go off at any time. Going off was what it did. The car handling in San Andreas wasn’t that great for me, so every time I had to make a turn, I ended up flipping off the road and totaling my ride. This mission was the epitome of bad driving. I dedicated numerous days to just this mission. As of this day I refuse to play San Andreas because of that mission. With a mission this frustrating you’d think that you would get cash or a pink slip but instead a deed for a garage in San Fierro as Catalina needs Claude’s car as they are going to Liberty City thus starting the line that leads to GTA III.
1. Supply Lines… – San Andreas
Oh, Supply Lines. Oh, how I hate Supply Lines. After CJ finds Zero hung by his underwear in a closet, he decides they should get even with his tormentor, an old rival named Berkley. How do they do this? By taking a tiny remote controlled plane and destroying his delivery vans and bike messengers (like, what?). Supply Lines is widely regarded to be the hardest mission of the GTA franchise, because the plane is tough to control, and there’s only a set amount of fuel that it has. So as you’re desperately trying not to use up the little fuel you have on the ridiculously wide turns it takes (because you missed the target the first time it passed), you have to remember that you have five targets, four of which are moving. These are sprawled across San Fierro, so you’re going to use up a lot of fuel. And even when you get all five, you still have to fly back to the rooftop where you and Zero are, and if you don’t make it, you fail. I have nearly broken my controller over Supply Lines. I threw my PS2 controller against a wall because of that mission, and it still makes a funny clicking noise sometimes. Why am I any part of this mission? It’s Zero’s plane, Zero’s rival, Zero’s stupid feud. He’s the technical genius, I’m just some young gangbanger out of Los Santos, what makes him think I have the technological know how to operate this plane correctly? The worst part about this mission is that, technically, it is not required to beat the game, which I didn’t find out until much later. So essentially, I could have avoided all of that frustration if I had known. But I did it. I did it, I succeeded, and now, I never have to do it ever again.
What do you think is the most anger-inducing mission? Let us know in the comments!
Additional Help: Allan Muir